Mumbly Bubbly About Growing Up

Hey life, is this how growing up feels like?
Is this how adulthood feels like?
Why is it getting harder and harder to be my self?
Why do I feel like the world is cruel?
Why should I lose my friends one by one?
And surrounded by people who are saying they are friends, but I have to wear mask around them to be accepted instead.
Why people judge?
Why do I feel like whenever I need someone to lean on, I find no one but myself and Him?
Is my friend really just solitude?
Why is it harder to trust?

Hey life, is this how growing up feels like?
When you finally aware which one is your real friends, who remember you in times of joy and sorrow
When you feel like future is so close yet so far
When priority is always what matters
When being pure counts as stupid and clever is the new evil
When your black and white suddenly turns grey
When everything is a competition
When you start to see things in a lot more perspectives

Hey life, where should I hide that 'always children' side of me while growing up?
Hey life, is this why people say don't grow up, it's a trap?

Ah.. wish me luck on growing up, life!